“Friends”

  
Ever felt like you’ve gotten so close to a person and then all of a sudden you guys just split? Well, I have and it always starts from the person you trust the most. To build trust you need to build a friendship or some sort of connection with them. High school is a perfect example of where you build friendships and trust. But I always wonder what would happen when I leave high school and I’m on my own. Will the friends I made still be my friends? What if we have a huge fight that goes out of hand? Is it going to be my fault? All these questions always encompass my head and finally those questions became reality. So I’m going to break it down about how it all started.

It was sophomore year and it all happened in my Spanish class. I’ve met the most amazing people I could have asked for. In our group we had a total of 4 people and called our self “Season 2”. The name came from a random day when we all hanged out and just had a deep conversation about our lives. We spent everyday hanging out and when a problem occurred I could always go to them to comfort me and vise versa. This went on for a good year until recently in junior year when everything fell apart. I feel that throughout my experience in high school I’ve learned to grow as a person and learn from my mistakes. However, whenever it came to friends the same situation always occurs and one of us are no longer friends. Losing a friend to me is like someone ripping a part of my heart. Especially when you’ve created such a strong bond with them. No one is right or wrong in the situation but it still let to a split. Social media has a major part into this (shocker) and because of this, misunderstandings occurred. From one post on Facebook to a couple tweets on twitter and everything exploded. During this I kept on thinking whether I was to blame and that this was all my fault. No one likes the thought of breaking up with a friend, but there comes to a point where you have to realize that everything isn’t your fault. For me I always have that thought that “the person will change” and no matter how long I wait they will never change. Being in a toxic friendship with someone that doesn’t listen or block you out when your trying to explain yourself is a waste of time. Why do I need to suffer trying to help someone who isn’t grateful for what they have? Time passes and even though there will be no closure I know what I did was the best for me mentally.

Nothing is wrong with helping someone but there is an extent where you need them to learn on their own. I just hope if this person is reading this that I’m not blaming just them for this whole situation because it was caused by all of us and one huge misunderstand.  I will still see you as someone who has a great sense of humor and very kind, but being friends with you has caused many hardships and I have to say “goodbye.”

If you’re in a friendship that doesn’t bring you mostly joy over sorrow than I hope your can learn to let go of them because in the end you will be thankful. It won’t be easy at all and it’s going to be an emotional process but through this experience I’ve learned who my true friends and they make me smile everyday. 

random pic of my childhood crush because he makes me happy